Noah – Toronto, Canada

My father’s neglect, emotional abuse, my mother’s emotional abuse and living in a dysfunctional family where my masculinity was seen as volatile, I was shamed repeatedly for being a boy and was forced to act like a girl throughout my childhood. School forcefully crossed dressed me and later I was sexually abused by a relative. My same-sex lust was for men who had what I did not have, a strong male identity almost father-like, it was something I coveted and never got from my dad, instead I was forced to not act masculine and was shamed for exhibiting masculine traits. Gender shaming and abuse are what brought on my same-sex lust (SSL). When I was working on the trauma that happened to me and working on gaining my own sense of masculinity and removing that shame, a lot of my SSL reduced and I was surprised to see my attraction for women to start growing and appearing.

What sort of things helped you in your journey and through your struggle?

Therapy for unwanted same-sex attraction, trauma and therapy for removing the shame has helped in this journey and being able to actually claim the masculine side of me has helped a lot.

What things did not help you in your journey?

People who are opposed to my journey (and journeys similar to this) are not being encouraging and people doubting the possibility of change when change is indeed possible.

Any additional comments you wish to make?

Everyone should have a right to client autonomy and self-autonomy. It is my right to do what I want to do. I am not hurting anybody at all, I am doing what I believe and what I find to be useful and beneficial for me with my needs, goals and wants. It is not the role of the government nor any authority to take away something that actually does help people who want the help. No one should be forced nor coerced into doing anything. Banning this type of therapy is very authoritarian and strips people of the right who want to change to be able to do so. Banning this therapy is telling me that I have to live with my scars, my trauma and my wounds, essentially you will be an accomplice in my abuse, which I find that to be criminal. Let people choose their own individual path. If someone wants to change, they, by all means, should have the right to change and it should be by their own volition. The government, the state, the authority should not be taking my rights away, they should not be deciding what is good for me or what is bad for me, that is subjective and that is my decision, not the decision of the government. Let people practice client autonomy and self-autonomy. It is my freedom, my liberty and above all, my choice for me to get this therapy, no one should be banning this.